Dealing with Harassment

One concern that survivors who attempt to leave cult groups mention is the issue of harassment. After all, groups that have invested time, money
and thousands of hours of effort into controlling the mind and developing “useful” skills in an individual do not want to lose that person for several reasons:
- They need that person’s skills
- Pride: it makes them look bad if someone leaves
- Fear that others will get the same idea

Harassment is real, and it can be quite intensive, based upon the group the person left, their money and resources, the individual’s position within the group, and how much personal investment in “getting the person back” the group’s leaders have.

In these blogs, I will describe some of my personal experiences with harassment: these are autobiographical and part of my history. You will learn
about both the good things I did, and some of the incredibly stupid things I did, in response to cult harrassment. Hopefully, by sharing my experiences,
it will help encourage others that they are not alone; and help people realize there are different options than they were taught by the groups for dealing with harassment.

Some of the experiences I describe I went through for several reasons:
- I was top leadership (in the “top 4”) for an international occultic group when I left, and their head trainer;
which made leaving unacceptable to the top leadership at that time – I was considered a security risk
- my brothers, sisters and children (who by this time were in the early 20’s) were all at the time I describe part of the leadership council for this group,
and several had a vested interest in “bringing me back” for punishment
- I have a tendency to speak my mind, and to make top leadership angry with me (by doing things such as writing articles or giving interviews)

Arkansas Nightmare
Eight years ago, I bought 11 acres of land up in northern Arkansas. I had been free of the cult for two years; and in the early fall my best friend and I
decided to go and homestead on the beautiful, wooded land with a pond fed by a stream. There was a small shack on the land, and we built a cement floor,
installed a wood stove, and proceeded to clear the brambles, cut wood for the winter, and work on improving the property. Things went well,
until in the middle of winter, we found evidence in the snow that others were visiting our property: footprints that came in and out over several fences.
We also saw men in military uniforms walking the perimeter of our property; when we walked towards them to ask what they were doing, they left rapidly.

One night, we heard splashing in the stream that ran past our small residence; upon going out the next morning, we saw bootprints in the mud;
someone had waded in the stream until they were slightly downhill from our cabin; the footprints then led to just outside our cabin. The bootprints were small,
nearly child-sized; next to them were adult prints. The next night, we sat up, and heard activity outside our cabin. I took my pistol out
(I had been practicing my marksmanship after breaking presentation programming to be afraid of guns), and my friend and I shot into the bushes
where we had heard the noise coming from, telling the intruders to “Leave, now, in Jesus’s name!” There was silence.

The next day, the noise began: a low-pitched rumble that seemed to go through the ground, and that caused waves of nausea; and a higher pitched,
incessant noise that was in the same range as “ringing in the ears” but much louder. This noise caused almost immediate pain.

Each day, the noise continued, and my friend and I became seriously ill, with joint pain, fatigue and horrendous pain throughout our bodies.
Finally, I packed a bag, jumped in our truck, and told my friend we needed to get off the land. We stayed in a motel that night. The noise stopped entirely,
and while we both felt “buzzy” for the next few hours, we immediately both felt better.

My friend and I both deduced that we were being hit with a combination of both low frequency and high frequency waves. My friend went online,
looked up the symptoms of being exposed, and we both had every single one. We decided to leave our land, since the pain had increased the past day
to an alarming amount. The next day, we went onto the land, packed our bags as quickly as we could. Within minutes of our going onto the land,
the high pitched noise started, much louder than before, and we were literally staggering and both almost passed out. We grabbed what we could,
jumped into our truck, and ran, leaving our land abandoned and feeling grateful we hadn’t died from the intense pain caused by the electronic tech waves.

On the Run through Four States
Because it was winter, we left in the middle of a huge snowstorm. This ended up being a blessing, because it would slow down those looking for us.
I cannot describe the feelings of being pursued, and trying to get away; it is NOT romantic or anything like movie depictions. We were both tired,
hurting and afraid. We both prayed a LOT.

We found a motel to stay in (that didn’t require ID), painted our truck a different color, and spent two days resting, doing our laundry in the tub
and sleeping lot more than normal; we were both recovering from the tech wave effects, and our bodies were attempting to recover.

I was angry at being chased off my land, which I had loved. I was upset that this was happening. And I had no idea what we would do. My friend and I
went to a neighboring state. My friend did not have a legal ID (this friend had stayed hidden for many years, and had successfully left an intelligence agency
located overseas), but helped with the driving. After my friend drove for four hours, we were in another state, and I felt an urgency to take over the wheel.
“I’m fine” my friend said, “I can keep driving”. But I insisted. We pulled over, I took the wheel, and ten miles down the road, we came to a police blockade;
they were checking the IDs of all drivers. If my friend had been driving, we would have been stopped, and possibly risked a fine or even jail.

I believe the LORD prompted me to drive before reaching this point.

My friend and I were praying continuously. We stayed at a motel and the next morning, continued driving. I didn’t feel comfortable with the area,
neither did my friend, so we continued driving two more days until we were in yet another state.

Finally, we headed to a state to the south. We found a cheap motel (the kind that charges hourly rates) and checked in without ID, since we didn’t want
to be found. There were loud parties, and it seemed obvious that quite a bit of drug dealing was going on in the rooms around us. We laid low, prayed, and started looking for a job.

God Comes Through
After searching for two weeks, my friend and I saw an ad in a local paper. We answered, interviewed, and were hired to work on a horse farm.
I loved the idea; I had raised horses myself for several years, loved them, and best of all, a smaller camper was included to live in, next to the barn.

We stayed and worked on the farm for over nine months. During this time, we drove the owner’s truck, and never used our ID. It was difficult
for my pride; our employer knew that we didn’t use ID, and from the looks he, his wife, and his uncle and the uncle’s wife next door gave us,
I knew they thought we were criminals on the run. Obviously, the idea of getting cheap labor ($100 a week in pay) overrode the owner’s scruples
regarding the past of those he hired.

I learned how to feed the horses (there were seven), clean stalls like a pro (my own horses had lived in a field with a lean to;
this was luxury horse housing); and loved exercising the mares. I had one favorite with a bouncy gait and a temperament to match, and also helped break a young gelding.

Meanwhile, I was developing my talents as an artist (after all, cleaning barns and taking care of horses didn’t take all day, and I was bored;
in my previous life before running, I had worked 80-hour weeks). I started painting oils, and over time, participated in several art shows
and held a one-person show at a luxury restaurant in the “big city” a half hour away. Living under an assumed name, I was glad for the peaceful life;
there was no harassment from the cult, and it was a wonderful time.

After nine months, I went to visit a local upscale furniture store in a nearby city that the farm owner’s wife suggested I go, to market my paintings at.
My friend was with me. The store owner was extremely friendly; visited my art site online, and seemed interested in selling my oils. My friend and I
then went to get an ice cream; but suddenly, I felt uneasy. “I think I knew the store owner” I told my friend. “I don’t have a good feeling
about this; we need to get to the truck and go.” My friend was unsure. “Are you sure? Don’t you think you are being a little paranoid about this?”
my friend said. We walked back to our truck, and saw the store owner outside with a pen and paper, writing down the license number of the truck
(it was the farm owner’s, not mine, and registered to him). As soon as he saw us, the store owner scurried back inside. “Oh, sh-t!” I said.
My friend and I went to our truck and left.

Once Again, It Starts
Over the next two weeks, there were a lot of new “visitors” to the horse ranch; individuals interested in looking at the horses (one was for sale),
in buying hay, etc. One couple held a picnic in the field outside our camper and asked to come inside to use our bathroom. I refused, not wanting to give
them a chance to view the inside of our place, and suggested they go to the main house, which had three bathrooms.

The husband of the couple took a camera out, and started taking photos of the camper, of my friend, and I (I turned away). I asked him to stop;
he insisted his hobby was photography and that he “couldn’t resist” taking pictures wherever he went.

My friend and I prayed; we realized our place was being scoped out, and didn’t know what to do. That night, the horses in the barn became restless,
and my favorite mare whinnied, at 1 am. I went out to check; as soon as I turned out the outside light, I saw a figure dart away from the barn,
leap over the fence, and run into the nearby woods. I told my friend we needed to make plans to leave right away. My friend agreed;
my friend wanted to give our employer notice for two weeks.

When we went into the barn, we saw evidence that the intruder had entered the stall of the mare that had whinnied (fortunately, she hated strangers,
and gave the alert); the water tray in the stall was bent from the intruder stepping on it; from that point, he had a perfect view of our home.
My friend and I were wondering what he was doing in the barn.

Two days later, my friend and I felt a low, deep vibration that was all too familiar; the feel of ELF waves. This was followed by bursts of very high-pitched
noise (sounding like a dog whistle in frequency) that could barely be heard. My friend and I started experiencing joint swelling and pain;
were unable to sleep, and began feeling the nausea and pain. I was terrified; I didn’t want to go through Arkansas all over again. Two days later,
we packed our truck, and left in the early evening, leaving before the two weeks was over. My friend and I were exhausted, nauseated, feeling “buzzy”
and experiencing joint pain all over. We drove our truck to a nearby city, and found a cheap motel to stay in.

Chased by Helicopters
We slept for five hours; then at 2 am, we heard a door slam next door to our room. Within a few minutes, we began hearing odd noises:
high-pitched noises; and a phone ringing in odd patterns. “We have to leave, they’ve found us” I said to my friend, who agreed.

We decided to check out, even though it was only 3:30 am. As we entered the lobby, we saw the door to the room next to ours open; a woman and man came out,
and stood in line next to us. “We’re checking out, too” the woman said to me. They had stayed less than two hours in their room.

My friend and I got coffee and donuts, got into our (ancient) truck and headed out. A few hours later, it was daylight. As I was driving, my friend
exclaimed, “Oh, crap!” My friend then stated, “there are two helicopters right above us, following us.” I couldn’t believe this. I pulled over,
looked up, and there they were; two black helicopters hovering in the sky at a fair distance above.

“Helicopters?!?!!” I yelled. “How the h-ll are we supposed to escape them?” We got in the truck, and I was driving, tears streaming down my face
(I was not faith-fulled at all at this point, as you might have gathered). I was yelling at God instead. “God, what do we do? There’s no way out!!
Why are you allowing this??” I was terrified. I knew they would hunt us down, get us, and there was nothing we could do. My friend and I stopped
at a rest stop next to a park, decided to walk down to the riverside and pray. As we did so, a couple, one that was all too familiar, came walking nearby.
“Imagine seeing you again!” said the woman from the motel, who was wearing dark sunglasses. “We must be going the same way.” She gave a smile that
looked more like a smirk. I couldn’t punch her, or I would be arrested for battery; but I hated the insolent smile and jaunty wave she gave as
my friend and I turned around and went to our truck. We realized that she and her companion believed they “had” us for sure, and I wasn’t so sure they weren’t right.

As we got into the truck and continued driving, my friend and I were praying non-stop. “God, HELP us! What do we do?” My friend then said “I have an idea.
It might not work, but it’s worth a try.” My friend then said, “the next time you see a power station, pull up and behind it. The electrical
frequency should block the copters from using their tracking technology.” An hour later, we came to one; I did what my friend said, and parked.
We waited. We looked above, and to our amazement, no helicopters. Nothing.

“I know of a better place to hide” my friend said, who had lived in the area several years before. We found a large power station on a river,
with woods nearby. We parked our truck in the woods, and took out some enamel spray paint we had bought two years before, and painted the truck
in camo colors. The homemade job was not pretty; but our truck certainly looked very different. Meanwhile, I slept on a blanket from the back of the truck,
beneath the trees. From time to time, I heard the chop-chop-chop of helicopters far above, and would start awake, terrified. “Go back to sleep,”
my friend said. “God is going to protect us.” “I wish I could be as sure as you are,” I said. Faith was not my strong suit at this point.
I fell back into an uneasy sleep, then when it was dark, we drove our truck (that unfortunately did not have working headlights) for several hours,
until we were out of the state. It was early fall, and we both had no idea of where to go.

“I know of a place a few hours from here” my friend said, who had lived in this state for two years. We finally came to a secluded lake near a state park.
We set up camp, and exhausted, slept most of the next day. We ended up camping there for two weeks, and it was a wonderful time of rest and recovery
from the terrible pursuit. I felt grateful to be alive, and to God, who had saved my friend and me. I believed at the time that God protected
my friend, who had much more faith than I. It wasn’t until years later that I realized that He was also protecting me, in spite of my small faith.

Do Miracles Still Happen?
After camping out, my friend and I chose to stay in a very cheap hotel for a few days (the running water and electricity were wonderful luxuries after roughing it). But we were running out of money. Down to our last $100, we drove south across the state line to a small town, and got a local paper. I found a place advertising a room for $100 a month; we answered the ad, put our last bit of money down, and rented a small camper for the next four weeks. It was damp, musty and scary; but at least we could rest
for a bit.

The next morning, my friend and I realized that we needed to find jobs quickly, since we were completely out of funds. I was terrified; after being on the run for the past few weeks, and now penniless, I was also depressed about our situation. My friend decided to apply at a local meat processing plant, since my friend had worked as a butcher in the past, and had experience. “How can you apply for a job without ID?” I asked angrily. NO ONE will hire someone without ID in this day and age; it just doesn’t happen.” (my friend did not have a legal ID, so this was a legitimate question). My friend replied “God will take care of me. He will provide the job if I’m meant to have it.”

I snorted in disbelief, and told my friend, “If God gives you a job without needing identification, then I will believe in miracles.” I had thrown the gauntlet down. I had faith for church services; I was a Christian; I believed that God loved His children. But seriously – a job without ID? Even God couldn’t overcome this obstacle, in my mind.

My friend went inside. A half hour later, my friend came back smiling. “They hired me; and they would like to talk to you; they would like to hire you, too, to wrap meat, since they need extra staff right now.” My mouth dropped open. I literally couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

Neither my friend or I would need ID; we both had jobs; and the company paid us in cash at the end of the first day, so we could buy groceries. I realized then that God does do miracles; He had heard my challenge, and chose to answer it.

If what you need is a miracle, God can provide it.


(zdroj)


Essentials to Deprogramming

Healing from mind control programming can be done, but it is not easy. One of the most difficult issues that therapists and supporters face
is the heartbreak of seeing individuals that they attempt to help break free get accessed continuously, and the individual is completely unaware.
They must weight the attempt to help against the possibility of harm, since attempts to heal can be used against the survivor if they are accessed.

Before attempting to deprogram Occultic programming, it is important to have several things in place. This is difficult work and having the support
that is needed in place can make a huge difference in success and preventing reaccess.

Safe Support and accountability
First and foremost, it is important to have a safe support person in your life who can provide accountability (i.e. help ensure that you aren’t doing missions
overseas for three months when you thought you were going to college or working). You will want to have someone you can talk to, vent to, or let
your parts out around who will not be a perpetrator to you or them. There are numerous reasons for needing support during healing, but basically:
the wounding to the survivor was done relationally, and healing is also done relationally.

I have heard of survivors (with government mind control, not extensive occultic programming) who have been able to heal “solo” but this is extremely rare.
While the individual may be able to break programming, and become free of access, these individuals may integrate, but do not truly heal, because
there has not been healthy attachment or modeling of healthy behavior for true relational healing.

Finding safe support may sound simplistic, but safe support and accountability from a non-dissociative person can be extremely hard to find.

Why is this? One reason is that most programmed survivors will be almost literally surrounded by cult people; and early in their therapy, they will have
no idea that this is so. The loving husband who supports your therapy and drives you to sessions may actually be a handler (this was true for me,
of my first two husbands). The best friend who is “always there” for you may be a cult sister. Family members are often also members of the group
a survivor is trying to leave.

I have had many, many survivors ask me “If I was in the cult, is it possible that my husband wasn’t?” My heart breaks when I hear this question,
because almost always, the answer is “no”. People who grew up in a cult group that programmed them will not be allowed to choose their own spouse;
the cult chooses them.

What about people who “got away” from the group in their teens?
This is another question I have been asked frequently. The history often goes like this: the survivor remembers being part of a cult group in their
early childhood, then believes that they somehow “escaped” when they left home to go to college or got married. In most cases, the belief that
the survivor “left” is a cover memory, designed to cover the fact that they are still active and doing their cult jobs. Most cult groups that
have put time and effort into programming members do not simply let people “leave”. I have also heard many stories of survivors who later in therapy,
realized that they never did leave, and the husband or partner they “chose” is actually their handler.

Another reason it is extremely difficult to find safe support and accountability is the lack of education and willingness in the church to provide this
to survivors. This is not a “slam” against churches, but the reality: many survivors report negative experiences if they disclose the fact that they
are breaking free from a cult to their church.

Realistically, when looking for support and accountability, the survivor may not have many –if any -options. There are very few “safe houses”
(and most that do exist have been reported to be infiltrated). Early in their journey, the survivor will want to pray that God does provide
this accountability and support.

Ideally, a support person will have the following characteristics:
- They are not dissociative, or are a completely healed survivor. Survivors should be especially wary of individuals that they feel an
“instant connection with” (real friendship takes time). Get to know a person well, and be prayerful, before asking them into a support role.
- Mature. All too often, supporters of survivors have their own unhealed wounds that can negatively impact the survivor.
- Have a strong faith. While I have known survivors who worked on healing without Christianity, I cannot imagine healing occultic abuse and the demonic
oppression that results without going to the real source of healing: the loving God who created us and never abandoned us, even during the worst of the abuse.
- Therapist: During healing, it is also important to have a therapist who is knowledgeable and experienced in dealing with cult programming,
and who is a believer. Healing work involves coming in touch with deep trauma, including intense emotions and painful memories. A therapist
who is warm, has a strong faith, and can help support you through this journey can make a huge difference.
- Another important source of strength while healing and deprogramming is a strong, loving church. Some of the best help for healing and some of the worst
spiritual and verbal abuse comes from churches, which makes it important to find one that is helpful. Look for a church that is based upon the Bible,
and where the people are loving and accepting.


(zdroj)


Common Challenges to Healing

Note: the following material is from the upcoming New Training Manual for those who Help Survivors from CARE; used with permission

Demonic Control
Survivors of ritual abuse not only need to greatly increase their joy capacity in order to consciously handle their horrific stories held in the unconscious
mind; they also often experience demonic control over the emotions, information and parts that contain those memories. During ritual events,
survivors are frequently forced to accept demonic spirits over parts. Demonic spirits then dictate to those parts the amount of disclosure,
if any, intensify traumatic emotions and they can flood memories and traumatic emotions if memories do begin to emerge in order to overwhelm
the survivor. Parts who have cooperated with agreements to commit sin in rituals (these parts are often coerced through threats or punishment
and torture) are vulnerable to continued demonic control and punishment due to un-repented sin. The sin gives ground to the demonic to continue to control these parts.

Furthermore, parts are often reluctant to accept Jesus and His forgiveness because of the programming to believe He would never accept them;
they could never be forgiven for the evil they participated in; and/or through cult trickery the parts are convinced that Jesus is duplicitous,
evil, condemning and untrustworthy (parts have been introduced to false Jesus actors who are actually cult members dressed up like the historical Jesus
and then participate in evil). Clarity regarding who Jesus really is is important for healing this wound.

Important truths for addressing demonic hindrance to memory work
– God is willing and able to forgive all sin committed by the survivor
– Vows, covenants and agreements made with the demonic, whether under duress or ‘freely given’, are NOT permanently binding and can be broken
(the demonic do not truly keep their sides of the agreements anyway). They are also sin and should be repented of, renounced and revoked.
– These spirits are easily removed by the true Jesus as the survivor repents and gives Him permission to do so

Vows and Agreements
In cult rituals, survivors are often ordered to take vows and agreements against their healing. Common agreements in the form of vows are “not to remember”
the ritual or traumatic event. This vow will commonly manifest in the presenter system or host system as saying, “I don’t know” to any question asked
that pertains to the traumatic event. The host is unconsciously repeating the very vow they originally agreed to take. This becomes a continued
agreement with the demonic to keep the information buried in the unconscious. When the host utters the words “I don’t know”, she agrees to forget again
and nothing is remembered. Through the perceived experience of the host, these words anchor to nothing and she really feels like she does not know.
It is common to find parts in the system with the name and role “I don’t know”. These are blockers to remembering and healing. Until the host
and presenter systems are ready to challenge vows like “I don’t know” and repent of agreements made with the demonic, memory work will likely be impeded.

Internal Conflicts
In internal conflicts regarding memory work, there are parts who want the memory work to happen, and parts who do not. These conflicts are often invoked
by concerns about the ‘cost’ or ‘consequences’ of the memory work: beliefs that memory work would lead to insanity, chaos, destruction or jailtime;
beliefs that memory work would cause loved ones to be hurt by the cult; beliefs that God can’t really help with memory work so bad things will still happen, and so on.

Parts who are reluctant to trust the true Jesus have likely been taught to trust only themselves and their own self-strength and self-sufficiency
and to do the cult’s bidding because it appear to be the path of least resistance. These parts were subjected to dealing with the demonic and cult
member’s torture, rewards and punishment system from the time they were young. This causes them to readily make deals with the demonic and cult members
in order to survive and save loved ones. These loved ones (those who the parts are purposefully bonded to in the cult group) are also threatened
by the cult and used by the cult to blackmail the survivor into vows and agreements against one’s own healing and doing evil deeds for the cult
to buy time for self and others to survive. They often believe they have no choice but to continue to cooperate by attending rituals in order
to minimize punishment from demonic torture and increase rewards (perceived saving self and others from punishment while receiving other fleshly perks).

The rituals always require a price to pay to demonstrate obedience and loyalty to the demonic and cult members. While saving self and those they love
from punishment, they are forced to participate in harm to those the cult has chosen as victims. Frequently, those they love are also victimized
but not as badly they are told as these loved ones would be treated if the parts decide to become disobedient to the cult. The evil deeds the parts
are forced to do to show their loyalty and accept vows “not to remember” in order to buy survival for themselves and loved ones becomes a demonically enforced
amnesic barrier to the traumatic event. This is coupled with the fear that the cult and the demonic will carry through with their threats that worse
will happen to self or loved ones if the disobedience continues and more is remembered and reported to outsiders. It is common for survivors
to report seeing internal walls that keep the survivor from seeing what is behind the wall. This can be a self-constructed wall patterned after
a real wall where the original trauma took place. This serves to remind the host that she cannot go past the wall or she will remember what
she does not want to see. There is often forced sacrificing in front of this wall to make a covenant not to remember anything beyond the wall
or anything done in front of that wall to seal the memory in unconsciousness.

The internal conflict is the desire to remember and heal while also not wanting to remember because it is too awful to remember and something worse
will happen if it is remembered. Hopefully, the above example of this common internal conflict clarifies why these conflicts need time and work
between the survivor and helper together. THIS WORK CANNOT BE RUSHED. If the helper gets pushy or impatient with these parts who feel as if theirs
and their loved ones’ very survival is riding on discovering the truthful and correct answers to their dilemma, they will withdraw and continue to
strike bargains with the demonic and cult members.

The conflicted part’s questions must be answered to their satisfaction about the historical true and living Savior, Jesus. There must be time given
to them to test the truth of His Word by attempting to give Him some control to see if He is consistent and powerful enough to protect parts
from demonic retaliation. They must have time to begin a relationship with the true Jesus to experience His great love for them. I have never seen
the LORD introduce Himself to parts in an impatient, pushy way. He is willing to wait patiently and will gently be a helper to them when they are ready
to ask. He is always “an ever present help in times of trouble” Psa. 46:1. When parts are satisfied that they have their questions answered,
the deceptive beliefs that were infused by the cult conquered, and the character of the true Jesus firmly understood and experienced, they will be ready
to ask Him to forgive vows they made and evil deeds done. They will be able to trust Him to protect themselves and loved ones from demonic and cult
retaliation instead of continuing to bargain with terrorists for their lives.

They will need to see from you, the helper, the modeling of LORD’s true character (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, thoughtfulness, gentleness,
faithfulness, and self control). Once they see that there are real Christians who do their best to live out the gospel, the host can learn to model
the same to parts. They will be drawn to the LORD’s character and love because you and the host have been consistently demonstrating the loving-kindness
of the LORD to them. They will be more open to believing the LORD is different from the example they saw in the cult because of the example of
your life and they will be open to experiencing His love directly from Him. You and the host are often His bridge to these wounded and deceived parts
who carry some of the greatest conflicts and obstacles to healing.


(zdroj)


Programming to Block Healing

When a survivor of mind control enters therapy, their trainers will be notified (often by the survivor themselves, since they frequently “report in”),
and specific programming to block therapy with their current therapist will begin to be put into place. This will be layered in addition to the generic
“no heal” programming that all survivors have installed that prevents unauthorized system access, or any communication between presentation
(front) parts and the cult host or systems.

Therapy blockers are highly programmed to completely resist therapy, will often have programming specific to the therapist the survivor is currently seeing,
and are extremely bonded to their trainers. They are highly motivated to prevent healing due to the fear of trauma (abuse) to the survivor,
and the even greater fear of losing contact with their loved one (the trainer the individual was bonded to).

Generic No Heal Programming
When the survivor is an infant, and throughout childhood, they will be put through mock “therapy” sessions and deliverance sessions in which
the “therapist” (a cult actor) kindly asks the child to share information and encourages them to disclose their abuse. Later in the setup, the child
is then tortured for talking and disclosing, is raped by the mock therapist, and is “hospitalized” (see the section on Crazy Alice programming)
to punish them for “making up” memories that “couldn’t possibly be true”. In order to heal, the survivor must choose to push past this programming
to enter therapy at all, unless they have been sent on a mission for this purpose (some survivors are sent to infiltrate the practices of therapists
who are effective and learn about how they work, in order to help the cult understand how to block therapy with the therapist).

In addition to the above, the survivor will see setups in which for every disclosure they make, a loved one is tortured horrifically, sending the message:
“if you talk, your loved ones will be hurt.” This basically shuts down healing for many.

Specific Therapy Blocking Programming
Each therapist has an individual style of working with people, and this may be used against the survivor. Because most survivors are still cult active
when they enter therapy, during “tune ups” (reprogramming sessions), the cult will attempt to make the survivor fear disclosure in therapy by doing the following:
- Create a VR of the therapist abusing the client following personal disclosure (shocks, rapes, etc.)
- Have an actor that looks similar to the therapist, trained to use the therapist’s favorite phrases to encourage therapy, who does mock therapy
with the survivor. Each phrase used (over and over) is combined with shock, rape or other torture to the survivor, so when they hear it,
they will recoil in pain and disgust.
- Create a VR of the therapy room, and then have the “therapist” avatar perform rituals there, to convince the survivor that
the therapist is “one of us” and therefore not safe to disclose to.

A survivor often must overcome an enormous amount of programming to trust a therapist at all, especially since during the time they still have contact
with the cult, they and their loved ones will be tortured every time they attempt to heal during reprogramming sessions.

If the survivor does choose to trust the therapist, they need to be aware that some people (but thankfully not all) drawn to providing therapy
or support for DID, trauma, and ritual abuse are programmed cult members who job is to access survivors seeking to get out. It is not unusual
for the “supporter” to later discover that he/she is actually DID and programmed as well, as time goes on. It can be difficult to determine at first
whether the blocks to therapy are coming because of programmed setups such as those described above, or because the survivor
(legitimately, at times) does not feel safe with the therapist.

This is why choosing a therapist is a matter for prayer, discernment and seeking input from a safe person (if the therapist knows one) regarding who to see.

Because of the above programming, survivors will often attempt to block therapy using different methods. These fears are genuine, and should not
be minimized; instead, the survivor needs support and prayer from individuals they trust, as they work through the issues.

Typical Therapy Blocking Programs
When a therapist works with a survivor, they will see a lot of ambivalence: the survivor wants to heal, but part(s) of the survivor is avoiding
the healing quite energetically. This can cause a lot of frustration in both the survivor, and the therapist, who over time may begin to wonder
“Why don’t you just heal?” The survivor may experience tremendous internal conflicts between their entire worldview and experience, and the information
that a therapist challenges this worldview with. In addition, the survivor will be emotionally invested in saving loved ones, who they believe
are being tortured each time they break programming.

This ambivalence and internal conflict can cause the survivor to display any or all of the following programmed responses in therapy:

- Cycling through parts over and over (rolodexing): this is a symptom of extreme system distress and conflict, as parts of the survivor
are attempting to heal and incorporate new information, while other parts are terrified that the programming is breaking. Rolodexing can also be
a punishment program that causes the survivor to look completely dysfunctional, and be used to reinforce the belief (which is a lie) that the survivor is “going insane”, etc.

- Only one memory comes up: some survivors go through weeks, months and even years processing only one or two memories that cycle
through again and again, even though they recognize they were raised in a cult group. This is a way of blocking therapy, since the survivor
never gets past that one memory to do other work inside.

- House that Jack Built: This is a specific form of blocking, in which the survivor cycles through bits and pieces of one memory,
and each time, must repeat the same sequence in order before they can add new information to the memory. The survivor will appear to need to completely
recount the previous information given before they can look at any new information regarding the memory, which can be wearing on both the survivor and therapist.

- False Christian work: If the survivor is working with a Christian therapist or deliverance ministry, they will pull out their false
“god”, “jesus” and “holy spirit” to “help” with the healing. They may be praying wholeheartedly, praying warfare prayers, doing daily Bible study,
agreeing with the therapist, and reporting visions of “jesus” intervening inside and how “close” they feel to “god” during therapy.

- False integrations: If the survivor is on a mission to bond with the therapist, learn their techniques, and later report to the cult
the therapy methods used, they will want the therapist to feel good about seeing them. This is often accomplished through false integrations
(the survivor is completely unaware that it is a program), in which dozens, hundreds or more of parts are “miraculously joined together” without
any trauma (or memories), and the survivor expresses deep gratitude about the “tremendous healing” they have received. This type of work can also be
a response to a huge need to please a prayer or deliverance minister who pressures the survivor to integrate before they are ready. While God can and does
accomplish the miraculous, most true integrations bring back life history, both good and bad, and resolve core conflicts and false beliefs that fueled the dissociation.

- Therapy sabotage: with this programming, the survivor will be late to appointments, may miss scheduled appointments, may “forget”
to pay for therapy, does not do therapeutic homework, and verbalizes wanting to drop out. A subset of this program is distancing the therapist/supporter
through methods such as pulling out sexual parts who attempt to “seduce” the therapist; pulling out hostile/rude/unpleasant parts who pick fights,
assault the therapist, or tear the therapist down verbally, and even threaten to sue the therapist if they become desperate.

- Shutdown programming: At times, a survivor who is still in contact with the cult will be given a shutdown/stop healing command.
When this is running, the survivor will experience the following:
• Is completely unable to communicate with parts inside
• Is unable to journal, collage or do artwork
• Feels intense anxiety at the thought of doing internal work
• Wants to be “normal” and “forget about healing”, wants a “real life” and chooses to leave therapy, sometimes permanently (note: this is different
from taking a short break from therapy or healing, which is normal at times)

(This form of programming is frustrating for both the survivor and therapist, since it seems to be a waste of therapy time working with someone
who cannot communicate with parts and does not even seem motivated to do any internal work at all.)

- Pulling out false issues to work on (cover issues): It is common for survivors, especially early in their healing, to work on
cover programming to prevent their going deeper into their system. The survivor may only remember their American host family; or believe that
they were only sexually abused, or abused by an organized cult group for a few years, then “let go when they moved away from home” or
“married someone outside the group” (which almost never happens in reality).

(Until the survivor goes past the cover, and is able to work with the true programming and beliefs that run the system, healing will be sporadic
and difficult, and they will be vulnerable to reaccess. The survivor must be willing do internal work, including journaling and asking the LORD to uncover
the truth, regardless of what it is.)

- Doubt, Belief that the survivor will never heal: This is programming designed to knock out the effectiveness of work done by the survivor
and therapist/supporter. This programming will be installed with setups in which the child is told to “heal” or “break the programming” under
command – and then experiences horrendous pain and terror (through VR or tech torture). The child in numerous setups is told to “integrate”
and again, pain, terror and hopelessness is installed. This is layered in many times over the years. When the survivor does try to heal in therapy,
they will often re-experience these feelings of pain, hopelessness and futility regarding healing, or even the possibility of God answering their prayers to heal.

(The survivor will also have been shown videos of individuals in lab settings attempting to break the programming that was installed
in them – and the people viewed in the setups go “insane”, or “die”. They will be shown the readouts for the slow, agonizing death, to instill
the belief that the programming can never be broken. In actuality, if that was really true, the programmers would not have to install this false belief.)

- Emotional flooding that does not promote healing: Some survivors will present in therapy appearing to be willing to heal, but the instant
that any memory comes forward, they will burst into tears and appear to “melt down” for what can amount to the entire therapy session, wailing over
their guilt and self-condemnation. While emotions will come with the recall of traumatic memories (and should), seeing hours of therapy “hijacked”
by a part crying every time the survivor comes to therapy could be a sign that this is running.

(The supporter or therapist may want to gently confront or challenge this part regarding their job within the system, and see if the survivor
is willing to work past this program. The survivor will need to become aware if it is running, and break any agreements to have this part step forward
if anything is disclosed. The traumas that created this response in what is often a very young part will also need to be resolved.)

- Child presentation: Normally, the infants and children in a mind-controlled system are heavily protected and guarded, and do not
come out in therapy until trust and safety have been established over time. A completely young presentation is highly abnormal,
and can be the result of several things:
• Programming breakdown: some survivors literally “burn out”, especially if they have been heavily used in the field on missions, and too much “wipe out”
and other amnesia programming of presenters afterwards can cause a situation in which the adults are too tired/traumatized to present, and children come forward.
• Mission programming: some survivors are programmed to present with children in order to seem “harmless” and “cute” as they infiltrate
a church or therapy organization. This is a programmed in presentation, with great trauma.
• Secondary reward: some systems have been heavily rewarded by abusers for “staying young” and childlike, especially if the main abuser was a pedophile.
The survivor may have starved themselves as a child/teen in order to prevent the appearance of breasts and delay the onset of menses, and to keep
their childlike physical appearance. This is often a system highly dependent upon others, and they may look to therapists and supporters
to “caretake” them as an adult.

- Constant crises with no resolution (burn out the support): This is difficult programming to endure for the survivor, because
the survivor has no idea that this is happening. All they know is that they are in deep distress, and want to pick up the phone and call the only
person that can help them (the therapist or support person). There will be crises during the healing journey; but a life of constantly cycling into
crisis week after week could be an indication that something is wrong. This type of programming is designed to “burn out” the supporter,
who becomes exhausted helping someone who never seems to heal.

- Denial: Every survivor will have some form of denial programming, and parts inside will hold this job. Denial parts are among
the most cult loyal, and deeply fear the torture or death of loved ones (including trainers) in the cult.
Denial parts will often verbalize the following:
• It wasn’t that bad
• I’m exaggerating things
• I’m making this up; I have a creative, sick imagination
• I’m not dissociative
• I’m just seeking attention
• This is all for secondary gain; I’ve been playing with your head
• I’m a liar
This part have been heavily programmed since the survivor was in the womb to say these things – and believe them. They are part of the primary
amnesia triad for presentations (denial, doubt and despair) that keep the survivor from truly believing their own memories.

(Healing of denial means finding why these parts (often represented in numerous systems, including next to the core) are so invested in doing
their job, i.e. who they are protecting, and why. They will be heavily bonded to a primary bond, and thus will be unwilling (or unable, due to
amnesia agreements) to disclose who they are protecting until safety and trust are established with the therapist, and with the true God.)

- “I don’t know”: It is normal for an individual to not know what is going on inside at times, or to be unable to answer questions
they or a therapist asks parts from time to time. But there may also be parts created who literally “know nothing” who are brought forward in response
to asking any information that might be helpful to healing, or breaking programming. These parts normally will have no history, and be unaware of
anything at all. Controllers may bring them out in order to prevent healing work during a therapy session; or to prevent journaling and finding answers.

(These parts will have been created with trauma, and will have made agreements to not know anything, and to forget any important information.
They may be formed during childhood during anti-interrogation training, since these parts are not lying: they literally do not know anything,
and so cannot reveal high-security information. Healing will involve working through the traumas with a trustworthy individual, and helping
these parts realize that the system is not being threatened, and there is no longer any punishment for sharing information inside.)


(zdroj)


Dealing with Rewards Programming

While survivors often disclose and struggle with punishment and pain programs, there is another, opposite side to these programs that
often are not verbalized until later in the healing process. This is rewards programming.

Using operant conditioning principles, cult programmers will almost always program in these two opposites:
extreme punishment (for disobedience) and extreme rewards (for obedience).

Reward can take some of the following forms:

- Bliss programming: this can include an emotional state of extreme joy or bliss that is put in as a reward that parts feel when
they “do their jobs”. It can be machined in (using technology), enhanced with euphoria-causing drugs, and demonically induced as well.

- “Heaven” rewards: as noted in the previous article on spiritual programming, starting in the womb, infants and children are taken
through re-enactments of visiting the “celestial realms” where they are greeted by “stars” (ascended beings), “angels” and others,
who all describe the joys of obedience and being rewarded with ascension.

- Pain stopping: when a punishment or reprogramming sequence is running internally,
and the individual “gives in” or stops the behavior being punished, one reward is that the pain stops.

- Fulfillment of Deepest Longings setups: in this setup, which is cruel, the individual is asked what their deepest dreams are
(this starts in early childhood). Then, the programmers do enactments in the programming labs, or through VRs, in which this deepest dream is fulfilled.
Parts are allowed to spend time with a loved one in the setting they most desire, such as being married to a beloved friend, being allowed to raise
children together, and having their dream job. This is a reward for “good behavior” and the parts (often presenter parts) are allowed to enjoy this
reward for several days or weeks a year in return for obedience. They are threatened with the death of these loved ones, and the destruction
of their dreams, should they ever disobey. This is unconscious, and the individual will have no conscious awareness of the programming. Instead,
they will have the unconscious belief that they can only be “truly happy” or have their deepest dreams fulfilled, if they stay in the group.

- Food rewards: sweet snacks and treats are often rewards for very young parts, and for parts trained to believe they are animals.

- Sexual rewards: individuals may be rewarded by being held, caressed, or given sexual favors, especially parts that equate sex with love.

- Status and promotions: this is a strong reward for cult parts, who have endured unthinkable pain and hardship throughout
the growing up years. These parts are always given some kind of promotion to provide meaning. The higher the status, the less the abuse is the belief
held by these parts (which is untrue; it only takes a different form). The chance to gain revenge on abusers is often part of this “reward”,
and those abused in childhood will at times turn on those who hurt them badly, if they gain higher status. There are often special awards and recognitions
given out to children who perform well at ceremonies for this purpose, yearly or more often. In some facilities, the child’s rank and performance,
as well as the team rank, are displayed on a public digital board as an incentive to compete and work harder,
since the children want to have a high score – and receive the medal or award at the end of the year.

- Money: when individuals work hard for their group, they may be given financial rewards that the presentation is completely
unaware of, such as a villa in Rome or on the French coast, or presents of money placed in accounts. The groups often state they will “take care”
of the individual during their old age, if they work hard for them.

These are a few of the rewards that international occultic groups offer individuals. This is the other part of the struggle to heal when an individual
chooses to walk away. They must be willing to become aware of the rewards and acknowledge the pull that they have on themselves and parts, and work out
ways to provide incentives that are not given by the group.

An important part of healing is learning to “self reward”: to find healthy ways to get the needs that were previously met by
organizational “rewards” (also known as “bait”) met. The needs are legitimate, and the longing and pain of giving them up can be part of the conflict
that makes healing more difficult.

Candy and treats can be bought, and given to inside parts as recognition that they are saying “no” to outside summons or signals to go back.
Parts can be taught about the real heaven, or alternative internal joyful imagery can be created to replace the former “celestial” reward. Parts can
ask for hugs from safe people to help meet the need for physical affection.

It is important to process both the traumas that preceded the “bliss” or rewards as well; and to become aware of how the programming was installed.
Parts who underwent this, and who are grieving over the loss of rewards (sex, status, power, money, dreams) will need to have their
feelings acknowledged, as the individual helps them through this process.

Eventually, the individual will discover a greater reward than the groups that use mind control can ever offer:
a life free from abuse, where their wants, needs and choices are honored. The reward of a life free from receiving love only at a great cost.
Freedom of choice and freedom from manipulation become rewards themselves, that can help greatly in the healing journey.


(zdroj)


Dealing with Emotions

One of the most difficult issues for survivors who are trying to heal from cult-related mind control to deal with is emotions.
Why is this?

In cases of extensive programming, the individual will have been tortured since they were in the womb, with one primary goal in mind:
control of the person. As part of the dissociation, the individual will be taught to “give away” their emotions to demons and parts,
who can “relieve” them of this intense pain.

Many times, controller parts will be highly logical, or be programmed to believe that they are “ascended” (above “mortal” feelings, which are considered
base, earth-bound, and physical).
The higher-order, or ascended systems in a survivor’s psyche will have bought since earliest infancy (or before) false beliefs such as:
- They are gods, angels or demons
- They are ascended beings
- They are immortals
- They have overcome their humanity
- They do not feel pain
- They do not have human emotions

This belief is based upon immense emotional and physical trauma. The types of traumas that create this type of belief can include:
- Killing the birth mother when the infant is born – and telling the infant it is his/her fault (this is very common in organized occultic groups,
and creates great internal guilt which is used to control the individual, who is told they are a “mother killer” and other equally painful lies)
- Torturing the fetus in the womb, and telling them that the pain they feel is the “pain of mortality” and the only way to escape the pain
is to “ascend” (by taking on a demonic or spiritual identity and spirit, which then shields from the emotional and physical pain,
but continues the delusion and deception that the individual is an “ascended being” instead of a human being who has been heavily traumatized)

The “Difficult Emotions” for survivors
Most presenter parts (the ones who normally enter into therapy) in survivors of mind control will have great difficulty in identifying or expressing
their emotions in a healthy way. This is the result of a combination of factors which can include:
- Dissociation of strong feelings (programming to not feel; with a very stoic or numb presentation)
- Role models (parents, trainers, others) who were very unhealthy or abusive in their expression of emotions, and dismissed any
expressions of feelings by the survivor throughout childhood (except to punish them)
- Unconscious fear that the emotion will overwhelm the survivor and they will not be able to handle it
(Some emotions are particularly difficult for survivors to identify or express in healthy ways. But with healing, emotions do come,
often with “flooding” when they first occur, until the traumatic events are dealt with, and the parts that underwent trauma can be comforted.)

Anger/rage
This emotion can be difficult for a survivor to deal with, because rage was often “sent” to parts whose job was to torture, punish or kill,
either external people or internal parts. As a child, while undergoing close quarters combat training, or during martial arts training,
they are told to “tap into” the rage to help increase their endurance and ability. Unconsciously, the survivor may associate anger/rage with
these activities, and avoid their expression completely in their presentation. Alternatively, the survivor may have a very aggressive/hostile
presentation that feels protected from sorrow, loneliness or rejection through responding with anger in situations that trigger these feelings.
Either way, many survivors have difficulty processing and expressing intense anger or rage.

They may fear that they will “lose control” or even “kill someone” if the rage they fear comes forward.

It is important to help the survivor find ways to express the rage that has built up over the years, and develop connections between unfeeling parts
and those that feel. This is done over time, with the “nonfeelers” gradually developing the capacity to feel, and to comfort the parts
that may feel overwhelmed with feelings.

Anger, or any other emotion, often comes in strongly, peaks within 2 -3 days, then gradually begins to subside (the amount of time in the cycle
will vary with the survivor, the amount of trauma, and the amount of support available to them). It can help to reassure the survivor that
these feelings will NOT last forever, even though tapping into a lifetime of dissociated feeling can seem that way at first.

It can help to develop methods of coping with rage when it occurs. The activities that help most will differ with each person; for some, vigorous
physical activity (hiking, running, boxing) or hitting a box with a bat will help. Hitting rocks with a sledge hammer (with goggles and protection worn)
can also help. Using a therapy bat, and hitting a bed or other safe object can also help. It is important to have some accountability/supervision
when first doing anger work because of the amount of emotion (which may seem scary to the survivor) coming out; and the possible need to be “talked down.”

In some instances, when a survivor gets in touch with the abuse memories and the associated rage, they may become homicidal for a time. Often,
they may verbalize wanting to go find the perpetrator, and do to them what was done to the survivor. It is important to assess the degree of actual risk,
and create a safety plan. The survivor needs to realize that going back and hurting perpetrators will place them in extreme jeopardy: they will be
immediately accessed and tortured themselves in most cases; or, they will be harmed spiritually should they succeed in hurting the perpetrator.

Forgiveness is an important component of healing, but it cannot be rushed. All too often in Christian circles, there is a rush to put the Band-Aid
of the words “I forgive them” without fully processing the extent of the loss the survivor incurred. This includes the rage at God that survivors feel,
because ultimately, they blame Him for what they have been through. This will be addressed further in the chapter on anti-Christian programming.

Guilt
Guilt is an extremely painful emotion for most survivors, for several reasons.

1.) It is often installed during prenatal programming, during which the fetus is asked if they want to live, or for the other (implanted zygotes)
to live. During the first months of life after conception, the fetus will always respond “yes” – and then the zygote the programmer wished to get rid of
is killed. This happens until there is only one embryo left – an embryo that experiences a lot of survivor guilt due to the death of the other embryos
in the womb. This prenatal guilt programming was first developed by Mengele, and is the foundation on which self-punishment, punisher
and other programming is placed.

2.) Throughout infancy and childhood, the survivor will have been taught to punish themselves. In a typical setup, if the survivor disobeys
or hesitates, they are punished brutally for failure; or, someone they love (a twin, brother or sister, or beloved trainer) is punished for their failure.
This causes extreme distress, and the child promises never to fail again. Internalized images of these loved ones are then punished if the child disobeys.

3.) The survivor will have blood guilt through participation in rites, rituals and sacrifices throughout a lifetime. If they are a trained assassin,
this guilt increases, and the survivor may find it difficult to believe that God could truly forgive them.

4.) The survivor, as they recover memories, will eventually remember being a perpetrator, being forced to torture other infants, children, birth mothers,
or to participate in other acts such as rape or punishing others. Most organized cult members are able to do at least basic programming on others,
since this is a skill taught from earliest childhood in most groups. The survivor will then recover memories of becoming what they
hated most – an abuser – and will need to deal with the resulting guilt.

5.) If the survivor has anti-Christian programming (and most do), they will have been forced to hurt an actor portraying “Jesus” or to nail
other children to crosses, and to do acts that show their hatred of God and Christianity. They are then told, “God can never forgive you,
He hates you because you did this” and the child believes this.

The survivor will need to hear frequently that God loves them and forgives them, since they will question this many times.

Scriptures about the love of God can be helpful (although these may also have been used in anti-Christian programming), as well as books about forgiveness
and grace; being kind to the survivor, and showing/modeling love and acceptance are helpful during this time of emotional struggle. The survivor
and their parts will need to come to a point of finally accepting that what God says in His word is true: they are forgiven,
regardless of what they have done, in spite of how they feel.

Shame
Shame is another painful emotion that many survivors experience. The survivor may feel shame regarding their sexual abuse, and the terrible forms
this can take in occultic and mind control settings (including bestiality, necrophilia, prostitution, child abuse, etc.). They may feel shame
because they were unable to fight the programmers; or because they “caved” or gave in to programming, or did things they hated doing.

Shame is the survivor labeling themselves negatively because of what they have done, and what they believe others think about them.
Healing takes time, with lots of acceptance, the opportunity to process memories, and the abuse and degradation stopping. Again, providing love and helping
the survivor understand they are accepted by others and by God, and that what they did was not their fault, can help. Often, they “caved” under conditions
that would be intolerable for anyone; support people showing that the survivor is not judged by them is important to healing.

Rejection
Many survivors experience rejection at numerous levels. They may experience:
- Self-rejection due to terrible wounds in the womb, such as the birth mother being injected with drugs that cause tremendous uterine pain;
she will then scream to “get it out!” or something similar, causing a deep rejection wound in the fetus.
- Childhood rejections as part of the abandonment programming designed to bond the child only to those the group wants them to bond to.
It is quite common for the parents in host families to reject or ridicule the child, to prevent their bonding with them,
which would interfere with the bonds with the trainers.
- Rejection by members of the group if they try to leave; if the survivor is reaccessed, they will be kicked around, tortured, raped, and told
that they are “evil”, a “traitor” and other things; members of the group will urinate and defecate on the survivor to show how they feel about them.
- Rejection by Christians who do not understand cult or mind control abuse, find it “scary” and who ask the survivor to leave their church;
or who silently shun the survivor.

Rejection is painful, and is a base of recontact programming (i.e. “nobody can love you but the group”). The survivor will need support as they deal
with their rejection and abandonment memories, and attempt to work at detaching from the cult, and attaching with non-cult support (which can seem frightening,
since they may have no idea of how to do this). Understanding, empathy and caring can help the survivor through this painful time of experiencing
the pain beneath their programming. By modeling acceptance, supporters are teaching the survivor how to accept themselves;
the love of God is also critical to healing rejection wounds.

Loneliness
Most survivors battle loneliness through much of their journey. They are leaving a group that contains their deepest, most intimate relationships,
and attempting to heal in a world that often does not understand what the survivor is going through (unless they are fortunate enough to find a good,
knowledgeable therapist or support person).

The deepest loneliness a survivor may face is for themselves. The cult has taken away their history; caused them to dissociate their deepest feelings,
and this causes a deep ache for truth and connection with the “real me” inside. Basically, the survivor is lonely for their core, who holds
some of the strongest feelings and beliefs inside, and who has been carefully hidden beneath numerous layers of programming and demonic.

Again, a supportive, nonjudgmental relationship is important as the survivor works through the issues surrounding developing healthy, safe support.
A real danger when loneliness hits is that the survivor, who misses loved ones in the cult, will rush to make new friends without prayer or discernment first.
It is very common for cult groups to “send” friends or romantic relationships to survivors who are attempting to leave the group.
They will seem well-meaning, caring, and very supportive of the survivor’s healing; but they will often have a job to do in their back parts.

It is also common for survivors to seek friendship with other survivors, but if the other survivors are unhealed
(i.e. early in their healing journey and unaware of current cult activity), it is quite common for them to access one another, and pull each other back
into cult activity. The survivor should always proceed with caution, and pray for discernment, before befriending another survivor; since they themselves
could also be used in this way without conscious knowledge.

Sorrow/grieving
When a survivor breaks free of a cult group, they will go through a period of grieving. This is normal; although the abuse has stopped, they often
will not feel “happy” for a long time. This is because they have cut off every meaningful relationship in their life, other than with God, and must take
the time to grieve this loss. Yes, the relationships were abusive; yes, these people hurt the survivor. But these people are
the survivor’s mother, father, brother, sister, children, best friends, and giving up their entire support system is extremely difficult.

The survivor who gets out of a cult knows better than most what Jesus meant by “counting the cost” to become free. They will also face grieving
because of threats against the loved ones who did not get out; for many survivors, these threats are communicated through hand signals as people pass them
in a mall; through subliminals online or on their cell phone; through videos of a loved one being tortured sent to their email address, or even direct contact
(such as a loved one showing up weeping, who raises their shirt to show the bruises and cuts on their back that they endured because the survivor left).

When the survivor is grieving, it is important to sit with them, figuratively speaking, and let them mourn. They may be numb, in emotional shock,
or they may cry nonstop for days at a time. They will want to talk about the loved ones left behind, and need to do this, to process the ending
of the relationship as they knew it.

It does not help to continuously point out to the survivor that these people were evil abusers. They know this, deep inside; but they also love these people.
This love/hate is what bonded them to the cult, and to doing their jobs; and is part of why they dissociated. Bringing down dissociation will involve
remembering and grieving for these loved ones left behind.

Processing the grief will vary with the individual. Writing a letter to the loved one(s) (that is never mailed); planting a “memorial bush”,
creating a collage, are all ways some have worked on their grief.

With time, grief does heal, and the survivor will be able to work on developing new relationships.
It is important that the survivor allows themselves this time.

Hopeless Despair
Hopeless despair is one of the most painful feelings that survivors can experience. It can be caused by:
- Extreme loss, including seeing loved ones tortured to death because the survivor is trying to leave the group; the programmers then blame
the survivor for the death(s)
- Programmed despair (programming to believe that the survivor can never heal; or that God can never forgive them)
- Technology torture: this involves the brain being hit by microbursts of high frequency or low frequency waves in various locations, to stimulate
the brain to experience extreme despair
- Core attachment pain coming forward: the realization that the survivor has been abused, manipulated, tortured and betrayed since conception
by the people they bonded to most deeply; this creates the despair that it was “all for nothing” that the survivor performed for the group
and survived torture over a lifetime (for the love of people that they now realize horrifically abused them)

When the survivor is in hopeless despair, it does NOT help to:

- Quote scriptures at them (although this will help at a future time).

- Tell them to “get their act together” or ask them “where is your faith?” since they already feel bad enough. What does help is to acknowledge to them
that you understand that they are in deep pain, and sit with them and synchronize. This is one of the most difficult things a support person can do,
since you will want to “rescue” the person from their pain, or feel bad that you can’t help them feel better right away. The LORD is the one
who will minister to the survivor, as they get in touch with their feelings and they express the feelings to Him. Core attachment pain takes time
to work through, and cannot be rushed.

- Sexual programming is installed from earliest infancy in most survivors. Programmers will sexually abuse the infants during diaper changes;
during bonding times, and will sexually torture the infants while tech stimulating the pleasure centers in the brain to create sadomasochistic parts
that enjoy sexual torture. Everyone the survivor knows and loves has sexually abused them, and this is considered part of a “love” bond, which creates
soul and demonic ties. The survivor may never have experienced any relationship in their life that did not involve sexual abuse, and they may have sexual parts
come out that “test” the supporter. At times, these parts will feel hurt or offended if the support person does not take them up on their offers;
after all, this is how people “love” one another in their thoughts. With time, patience and caring, they will come to understand
that someone can truly care for them without wanting a sexual relationship.
(The infants are stretched with special instruments so by the time they are two, they can accommodate an adult penis without severe damage.
Infants are stimulated to experience multiple orgasms with vibrators as a “reward” for performance. Information may have been put in a sexually aroused
state, which is a natural amnesia barrier, since the information can normally only be recovered when the individual is in that state - although
with the LORD’s help, the information can be recovered without arousal.)

- The terror is often based upon highly realistic virtual reality, which replays the infant’s prime terrors. Entire terror lines are installed,
with the purpose of controlling the survivor. These terrors are often encapsulated in the framework of a “hell” created by the programmers,
with different levels playing out different terror scenarios, f.e.:
• At base level, fetal and infantile terror drive many punishment and recontact programs. This can be experienced as restless, the feeling that
“something is wrong” and if the survivor continues to not recontact, can escalate to panic, then terror. Night terrors are common, since the survivor
will be programmed with dreams of punishment and terror if they stop contact, or astrals may come to remind the survivor of the terrible fate
awaiting them if they fail to recontact.
• Core terror (the belief that the universe will fall apart and turn black, and all people the survivor loves will die, and they themselves
will be “unmade” if they continue healing) makes it difficult for the survivor to face dismantling deep programmed beliefs and systems internally.
The terror was installed for this very purpose.
• The survivor will often feel as if they are “losing it”, “going psychotic” or “losing their mind, and can’t stand a single second more of this”
as the dissociated emotions come forward. This is based upon programmed beliefs that if the survivor tries to dismantle their own programming,
they will go insane; they may be given drugs, tech torture and setups to “prove” this belief. (They really are NOT losing their mind,
but they will feel this way as the terror hits.)

It can help to ground the survivor to here and now (feeling the ground beneath their feet, touching something soft, or warm, or cool;
hearing music) when terror hits.

Remind the survivor that they survived the event happening the first time, and they can survive remembering. Remind them that
if they attempted to “break programming” in the lab, that it was a setup; that now, they have safety.

Getting rid of the demonic that holds the programming in place (by repenting of the rituals and sacrifices performed before and after installation
by the survivor to seal it in, and repenting of the agreement for installation) can also help.


(zdroj)


The Greatest Healing Tool

In this blog post, I wanted to talk about the greatest healing intervention that a survivor can experience: love. During my own healing journey,
over the years, I have discovered that the most healing came not from what a person knew, but how much they cared.

I do believe it is good to be informed about how programming works. It can be tremendously helpful for a survivor to feel validated as he or she remembers,
that others have gone through the same. But survivors of mind control and ritual abuse have been hurt in a relationship – and healing will often come
through a relationship that is non-abusive, and offers caring concern.

I have had several people support me through my own healing journey, to varying degrees. I have had therapists, who offered an hour a week
(or, an occasional crisis session). While this was helpful, it wasn’t enough. I had a lifetime of attachment and bonding to people who since
I was in the womb told me they loved and cared for me – and I had parts who believed this. It wasn’t until I met individuals willing to demonstrate real,
nonabusive caring, that I had a new paradigm to work from: not everyone is hurtful, and not everyone wants to use me to get something.

Genuine caring does this. When I say “love” in the supportive relationship, I am not talking about romantic love, or sexual love
(the survivor has already experienced plenty of this). I am talking about a relationship where the survivor is listened to, respected,
and their reality validated, or at least the question of whether memories are “true” is put on the shelf until more information is processed,
and parts share more. This kind of relationship, which can come from a friend, or someone willing to walk alongside the survivor, is in my opinion
the most important tool for healing, even more important than understanding programming.

The people who cared about me enabled me to break my bonds with my abusers. These individuals helped me learn new ways of relating. They listened to
grouchy parts (who were quite unhappy with my choice to leave the group); loyal parts (who came out sinister, angry or silent and tried to sabotage relationships),
and false Christian parts (who wanted to turn everything into a simple "praise the LORD, let’s not look at the past"). They showed these parts compassion,
and so I learned to show myself compassion. They believed I could heal – and helped overcome the terrible despair that would hit at times
(the “maybe I was hurt too much to ever get better” type).

One of the most important tasks for a survivor who is healing is to try and build support, and caring friends.
It can take time. Sometimes, there is no one available (I have gone through those periods, too, and it’s tough); but the true God is always available;
the true Jesus is there, and will hear prayers that God will provide friends. It doesn’t take a lot of friends; most of the time,
I have only had one or two in my life; but they are a true blessing, and such an important part of the journey.

I am learning to be a friend to others now. This is the result of caring: the survivor as they heal will want to help others too. This is a process,
since real caring isn’t what I know, or what my past was. It is learning to listen to others, hear what they are saying about how they feel, and being there.
My prayer is that the LORD will raise up many who will be willing to help survivors heal, and be part of the blessing of seeing someone heal.


(zdroj)